A Love Affair with Being Single

Everyone has a weird relationship with the state of being single. Most of us have a love-hate relationship with our single selves. One day it’s “you’re so awesome and you do so well on your own,” and the next it’s “why can’t you hurry up and find someone, what is wrong with you?”

Part of the problem lies in all the expectations of society. You have to be skinny, you have to find a good job, you have to figure out relationships, you have to have a good relationship with your family, you have to move out and stand on your own two feet–and you have to do it now. Time is ticking and we’re running out of youth.  The media makes it seem as if youth is a woman’s greatest asset, even when it can be her greatest flaw.

I have been told so many lies about relationships infused throughout every culture I’ve experienced. Oh, the lies. My favorite one is: certain types of relationships can only happen at certain times. You can’t find your soul mate in high school, you’re too young. You can’t find a good husband when you’re 40, you’re too old.

In this climate, how can you blame anyone for having a bipolar relationship with being single? No matter how much unattached fun you are having, the reminder of a clock ticks away with every movie, billboard, TV show and innocent “so do you have a boy(or girl)friend?” Some days you worry it’s too late for you. Then there are the days when an endless stream of relationship complaints pours in from all your friends in relationships, and you buy yourself an ice cream cone for making good choices.


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